Your Sexually Addicted Spouse by Marsha Means |Ph.D. Steffens, Barbara [RARE BOOKS]
Your Sexually Addicted Spouse by Marsha Means |Ph.D. Steffens, Barbara [RARE BOOKS]
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Book Summary
Your Sexually Addicted Spouse explores the profound impact sexual addiction has not only on the individual but, critically, on their partner. Drawing on groundbreaking research, the authors frame the partner's experience as trauma—with symptoms akin to PTSD—rather than codependency. The book walks readers through stages of discovery, betrayal, emotional upheaval, and the path toward healing. It includes powerful real-life case studies, guided reflection questions at the end of each chapter ("On a Personal Note"), strategies for managing crises, and anchor points for self-care. Helpful appendices offer lists of mental-health professionals, clergy, and support resources.
Therapeutically oriented, the book emphasizes deciphering trauma responses, establishing boundaries, and encouraging partners to reclaim their sense of self—whether they choose to stay in the relationship or not . Reviews highlight its compassionate tone and evidence-based approach, with Library Journal calling it “sensible and authoritative” and noting that it serves both partners and counselors.
About the Authors
Dr. Barbara Steffens, Ph.D., LPCC, CCPS, CPC has been a pioneer in studying and treating the effects of sexual betrayal on partners. Since 1999, she has run Safe Passages Counseling in Cincinnati, offering individual and group therapy. She also led the Association for Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists, training professionals to treat betrayal trauma. Her landmark 2005 study found that around 70% of betrayed partners exhibit significant PTSD symptoms, prompting a shift in the field’s understanding of these relationships .
Marsha Means, M.A., a licensed marriage and family therapist and founder of A Circle of Joy Ministries, brings both professional and deeply personal experiences with betrayal trauma. She offers coaching, group facilitation, and has authored several related books. Together with Dr. Steffens, she delivers practical tools and empathetic guidance rooted in clinical insight and lived reality .
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